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But real talk—findin one’s tricky. Web’s full of fakes, X posts screamin “hot girls near u,” but it’s all bots, man! Eat my shorts, scammers! I ain’t droppin cash on a ghost. Gotta hit the corners, talk fast, don’t look like a narc. Last time, I got nervous, stammered like an idiot—she walked off! Ugh, hated that, felt like Joel losin Clementine all over again.
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First off, I’m running late. Classic me. I spill my coffee all over my favorite shirt. Ugh! It’s like, “Great start, dude.” I rush out, dodging cyclists on the Van Heekplein. Those guys are like ninjas on wheels. One almost took me out! I’m like, “Chill, bro! I’m just trying to live!”
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