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Well, y’all, lemme tell ya somethin bout findin a prostitute – it’s a dang mess out there! I’m sittin here, thinkin bout WALL-E, that lil robot fella cleanin up trash, and I reckon findin a hooker these days is like diggin thru Earth’s garbage piles. “Buy n Large” ain’t got nothin on these streets, y’hear? How’s that workin for ya, huh? Runnin round, chasin tail like some lost puppy – shoot, it’s pitiful!

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But then, I see it. A dog. A big ol’ fluffy one. I’m a sucker for dogs, man. I kneel down to pet it, and it jumps on me, all excited. I’m laughing, and then I realize—my phone’s in my pocket. The dog’s tail knocks it out, and it goes flying! I’m diving for it like it’s the last slice of pizza. I catch it, but not before it lands in a puddle. Great. Just great.

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