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About Amsterdam

What pisses me off? The fakes, man—catfishin’ with old pics. Like, c’mon, be straight up! Had this one time, thought I scored—turns out she’s 60, not 30. Whoa. Almost bailed, but she had stories—said she banged a senator once. Kinda dope, right? Made me happy hearin’ that grit.

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So, I grab my drink and head to the market on the Markt. It’s buzzing, people everywhere. I’m dodging strollers and old folks like I’m in some kind of obstacle course. I spot this vendor selling fresh stroopwafels. I can’t resist. I buy one, and it’s like heaven in my mouth. But then, outta nowhere, this kid runs into me, and my stroopwafel goes flying! I’m standing there, mouth agape, watching it land on the ground like it’s in slow-mo. I’m like, “Nooooo!”

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