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Oh, and the lingo— “house of negotiable affection,” ha! Cracks me up. Clients? Losers, mostly. Lonely sods or rich pricks thinkin’ they own the place. “I’m split, I’m split,” like Freddie’d moan—split between guilt and glee. Me? I’d limp in, cane tappin’, scopin’ the lies. Girl says, “I love my job!” Sure, sweetheart, and I’m Hugh Laurie.
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But then, as I’m leaving, I trip over my own feet. Classic me, right? I drop my pastries, and they go flying everywhere. I’m standing there, mortified, while people just stare. I can’t even. But then, the old lady from the market comes over and helps me pick them up. She’s like, “Don’t worry, it happens to the best of us.” I’m like, “Thanks, I needed that.”
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