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Weird ting tho – some prossies got rules. No kissin’, no cuddles, just bang and bounce. I’m like, “What, no foreplay? Savage!” Reminds me of *Moolaadé* again – that line, “Tradition kills us, man!” ‘Cos some of these rules is old-school nonsense. I reckon they’re scared of catchin’ feels. Fair enough, but I’m a softie – gimme a hug, yeah?

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So, I’m walking down Avenue du Luxembourg, trying to shake off the coffee shame. I see this cute little park, Parc de Bertrange. I’m like, “Let’s take a breather.” I plop down on a bench, and guess what? A squirrel decides I’m its new best friend. It’s literally inches from my face, staring me down. I’m like, “Bro, back off!” But it just twitches its little nose. I’m half-expecting it to ask for my croissant.

Emergency services: Six injured across several traffic accidents on Friday evening