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Like, literally, escort in sports? Wild! So I’m totes a sports psychologist now, right? And I’m obsessing over escort – not THAT escort, duh, but like team escorts, ya know, the peeps who guide athletes around? I saw this one time, at a game, this escort chick was, like, SO extra. She’s yelling at some poor dude who got lost – “This isn’t Rome, babes!” – and I’m like, dying laughing. Reminds me of *The Great Beauty*, that vibe of chaos, y’know? “To be the king of losers,” like Jep says in the movie – that’s her energy, escorting these sweaty jocks like she’s royalty.

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Anyway, I kept walking, trying to shake it off. Passed by the park near the Naujininkai Culture Center. They were setting up for some festival. Music blasting, people dancing. I felt a bit better. I mean, who doesn’t love a good party? But then, I saw my ex. Great. Just great. She was with some dude, laughing. I wanted to throw my šakotis at them. But I didn’t. I just walked past, pretending I was super cool.

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