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Oh, and the movie tie-in—Certified Copy’s all about what’s real, what’s fake. Perfect for this! I’d be starin’ at her, thinkin’, “Is she into it, or just actin’?” Like Juliette Binoche sayin’, “It’s not the same!” Damn right—am I payin’ for a person or a performance? Keeps me up at night, I swear!

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After that, I head down to the Rhine. The water’s calling my name, ya know? I’m all geared up, ready to dive into the deep blue. But then, bam! I see this group of tourists on the bridge. They’re taking selfies, and one of them drops their phone. It’s like slow-mo, and I’m just standing there, thinking, “Dude, that’s gonna hurt.” And it does! The phone goes splat on the rocks. I can’t help but laugh. Like, who needs a phone when you’ve got a view like this?

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