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About Ust-Kamenogorsk

Met this bloke online once, right? Said he’s “discreet” – ha, turns up in flip-flops, screamin’ “OI, BEAN!” at the pub! *flails arms* Subtle as a brick, that one! Made me mad, I tell ya – I’m there, all sneaky-like, and he’s a foghorn! *huffs, crosses arms* But then, this other time, lass winked at me – proper chuffed I was! *grins, dances in chair* Sex-dating’s wild – 1 in 5 folks do it, true fact! Bet Szpilman’d be rubbish at it tho – “I must play Chopin first!” *giggles, pretends to play piano* “That is my destiny!” he’d say, all dramatic-like.

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So, I’m trying to calm them down, right? And then, boom! The youngest, little Aisulu, spills juice all over the carpet. I’m like, “Seriously?!” Juice everywhere! I’m scrubbing it like a madwoman. I mean, who knew grape juice could stain like that?

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