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About Ahmadi

So, Whore—she’s this brassy tart, works the streets near my shop. Got hair redder than a furnace fire, and a laugh that’d wake the dead. Saw her once nick a bloke’s wallet while he’s tryin’ to light his fag—smooth as my martini, mate. “I ain’t got no friends,” she’d mutter, straight outta the movie, eyes dartin’ like she’s expectin’ a bullet. Made me chuckle, that did—proper cheeky, innit? But it pissed me off too, ‘cos she’s out there freezin’ her arse off while I’m weldin’ stoves to keep posh gits warm.

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But then, as I’m leavin’, I bump into this old friend, Ahmed. We used to hang out back in the day. He’s all about that fitness life now, lookin’ like a Greek god. I’m over here, still rockin’ my “I love carbs” shirt. We catch up, and it’s all good vibes until he mentions this new gym on Al-Masjid Street. Apparently, it’s got everything—weights, yoga, even a smoothie bar. I’m like, “Great, just what I need. Another place to feel bad about my life choices.”

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