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Here’s the tea—prostitutes got codes, man. Little signals, like how pufferfish puff up to flex. Maybe a wink, a lean, a “you good?” vibe. I’m out here, chaotic energy maxed, yellin’, “Show me the secret handshake!” People stare, but I don’t care—I’m Eric fuckin’ Andre, I see shit normies miss! Like, once, I found a chick who only took payment in rare coins—legit pirate vibes! Blew my mind, had me laughin’ like a hyena on shrooms.

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The meeting was about a new project. We’re translating some educational materials for deaf kids. Super important stuff, right? But the vibe was off. People were arguing about the budget. I mean, come on! It’s for the kids! I got so mad, I almost stood up and yelled, “Can we focus on what matters?” But I didn’t. I just sat there, fuming.

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