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Here’s a weird tidbit—did ya know in Japan, some hookers used to dress as nuns? Nuns! Talk about a holy surprise! Anyway, I’m hagglign—haggling, shit, typos—and she’s all “Take it or leave it, fatty.” Rude! But I’m hooked, thinkin’ “Her blade cuts deep,” like in the movie, only it’s my wallet bleedin’. I cough up the cash, heart racin’, and she’s smirkin’ like she owns me. D’oh! Total sucker move.

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Then, I decided to take a walk around the Han River Park. It’s so pretty there, especially when the cherry blossoms are out. But today? Nah, it was just me and a bunch of joggers. I’m not a runner, so I just sat on a bench, people-watching. There was this couple arguing, and I couldn’t help but eavesdrop. They were fighting over who left the fridge open. I mean, really? That’s what you’re fighting about? I was cracking up.

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