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Now, here’s the tea: she takes him ‘round back, and I’m like, “Oh, Lawd, he’s done!” Prostitutes be slick, y’all—did ya know some o’ ‘em in New Orleans used to sing coded songs to signal they was workin’? True story! Joe don’t know that, he’s too busy pantin’. Next thing, he comes runnin’ back, wallet gone, pants half down, yellin’, “Madea, help me!” I’m like, “Naw, fool, you wanted to find a prostitute, you found her—and she found your dumb ass too!” Halleluyer! I’m dyin’ laughin’, but also hot as a skillet—why these men so stupid?

‘Why do people hate us?’: Sex workers in Seoul’s last red-light district fret over future

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Finally, I get off at the City Hall stop. It’s a nice area, lots of trees and stuff. But man, the line was longer than my to-do list. I’m standing there, tapping my foot, getting angrier by the minute. I mean, c’mon! It’s just paperwork!

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