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About Osaka

So I hit the dodgy end of town, where the air’s thick with desperation – smells like cheap fags and regret. We shall never surrender to the coppers lurkin round corners! Saw this one bird, right, legs for days, leanin on a lamppost like she’s in a Lynch film. “Where’s the freeway?” I mutter, half expectin her to vanish like a dream. She smirks, says, “Fancy a ride, guv?” – cheeky mare! Made me chuckle, that did – prossies got sass, innit?

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But then, outta nowhere, the gondola stops! I’m hanging there, like, “Great, just great.” I’m stuck, and my phone’s dying. I’m thinking, “This is how I die. Stuck in a gondola in Yuzawa.” But after a few minutes, it starts moving again. Phew! I’m alive!

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