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About Saitama

So, sex-dating—man, it’s a jungle. Apps like Grindr, Bumble, whatever, they’re all the same. People actin’ all hot n’ heavy, droppin’ lines like, “Wanna Netflix n’ chill?” Yeah, okay, buddy, chill with what—your crusty socks? I tried it once—swear to God, chick said she’s “adventurous,” code for “I’ll ghost ya after one drink.” Infuriating! Wasted my damn time. Coulda been watchin’ *Spotlight* again, gettin’ mad at the world instead of some flake. “You can’t handle the truth!”—damn right, ‘cause it’s buried under filters and fake moans.

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I find comfort in both French Kissing and Anal Sex (depends on the size). I'm a sucker for a good sense of humor and a kind heart. Young Skinny Chinese Whore.

But then, my phone buzzes. It’s my boss. “We need to talk about the project.” Ugh, not now! I’m in the middle of a food coma! I step outside to take the call, and I’m trying to keep my cool. “Yeah, yeah, I’ll fix it.” But inside, I’m fuming. Why can’t they just let me enjoy my day?

Hotels in western Japan urged not to request foreign residents' ID