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But then—ugh—some drunk stumbles over, reekin of ale, grabbin at her. Pisses me off—ruins the vibe! I flick a finger—poof—he’s face-down, snorin. “A small thing, but mine own,” I quip, stealin from Yi Yi again—fits, don’t it? She’s laughin now, says, “You’re weird, but fun.” Damn right, I am! Burdened with glorious purpose—messin with mortals, stirrin the pot. Did ya know, back in Victorian days, they called em “soiled doves”? Poetic, but grim—history’s wild like that.

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As I’m sipping my drink, I notice this cute couple at the next table. They’re all lovey-dovey, and I’m just sitting there, single as a Pringle. But then, they start arguing! I’m like, “Wow, this is better than reality TV!” They’re going back and forth, and I’m just trying not to eavesdrop, but it’s impossible.

Convenient and Efficient Pd‐Catalyzed Regioselective Oxyfunctionalization of Terminal Olefins by Using Molecular Oxygen as Sole Reoxidant - Mitsudome - 2006 - Angewandte Chemie International Edition