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About Osaka

*We come in peace* (robotic tone). Yo, so me and my alien bros, we’re zippin’ thru the galaxy, right? Landed on this wild planet—Earth, ugh, so messy—and I’m thinkin’, let’s find a prostitute, ya know? Like, why not? Been watchin’ “Ratatouille” on repeat—*“Anyone can cook!”*—and I’m like, anyone can hustle too, right? So, we beam down, tentacles twitchin’, lookin’ for some action.

Starting point of Akasaka-Tarui hiking

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First off, I grab my gear and head out. I’m cruising down Kōen-dōri, and I can’t help but admire the cherry blossoms. They’re in full bloom, and it’s like nature’s confetti. But then, BAM! I hit a pothole. My coffee goes flying. Great start, huh? I’m cursing under my breath, but whatever, I’m an arborist. I can handle a little chaos.

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