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About Kyoto

Thing is, right, it’s a gamble. Some prossies are legends – proper pros – others? Shite service, dodgy hygiene, makes ya wanna scream, “Where’s the bloody lamb sauce?!” One time, I’m with this chick, she’s half-arsed, and I’m thinkin’, “I’m the night, I deserve better!” Kicked her out, mate, no regrets. You gotta know the game – punters get stung cos they’re thick as pig shit. Me? I’m sharp, I’m Gordon fuckin’ Ramsay, I don’t settle for crap!

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First off, I hit up the local konbini on Kōen-dōri. Gotta love those 24/7 spots. Grabbed my usual onigiri and a can of that weird green tea. I swear, it tastes like grass but in a good way? Anyway, I’m munching away, and boom! I spill half my breakfast on the sidewalk. Classic me, right?