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Oi mate, so I’m your Personal Shopping Assistant now, yeah? David Brent’s on the case, innit! Let’s talk findin’ a prostitute – proper tricky business, that. Not your bog-standard Tesco shop, eh? Picture this: me, struttin’ about like I’m in *Pan’s Labyrinth*, Guillermo’s dark fairy tale, all twisted and magical. “Ofelia, obey me!” – nah, more like, “Lads, where’s the talent at?” Cringey corporate vibe, but I’m lovin’ it.

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Finally, I wrap up my work, and it’s time to hit the izakaya. I meet Kenji, and we order way too much food. I’m talking yakitori, edamame, and like, a mountain of sake. We’re laughing, reminiscing about old times, and I’m feeling good. But then, I spill sake all over my shirt. Classic move, right? Kenji’s dying, and I’m just sitting there, soaked and embarrassed.

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