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So, findin’ a prostitute—where do ya even start? Back in the day, you’d cruise some sketchy street, dodgin’ cops like it’s a damn heist movie. Now? It’s all apps, cryptic posts on X, coded emojis—eggplant this, peach that. I’m like, what’s this, a fruit salad?! Drives me nuts! I’m scrollin’, thinkin’, “This is not a game, this is my life!”—straight outta Carlos, baby. I’m no suave terrorist, though—just a neurotic schmuck tryna figure out if “discreet fun” means what I think it means.
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Then, I decide to check out the local shrine, the Hachiman Shrine. It’s beautiful, all those red torii gates. I’m feelin’ all zen and stuff. But then, I see a bunch of kids runnin’ around, and they’re loud! Like, chill out, kids! I’m tryin’ to meditate here!
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