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About Saitama

So I roll up, real smooth-like, and she’s all, “Hey, sugar, what’s good?” I’m sweatin’ bullets—nervous as hell, thinkin’ bout Robert Downey Jr.’s character, Paul Avery, all cocky but shaky inside. I say somethin’ dumb, like, “Uh, you workin’ late?” She laughs—cackles, really—and I’m like, “Well, shit, how’s THAT workin’ for ya?” She’s cool, tho, tosses me a wink. Surprised me—she wasn’t jaded, just playin’ the game.

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But then, outta nowhere, this seagull swoops down and snatches my leftover ramen container right outta my hand! I’m like, “Seriously?!” I chase after it, but it’s too late. That bird’s livin’ its best life, and I’m just standin’ there, flabbergasted.

Wholesaler giving fruits and vegetables to needy single-parent families in central Japan