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Then – jackpot! Found this one chick, all sassy, says she’s “discreet like a shadow.” I’m sold! We chat, and I’m gigglin’ like a kid – happy vibes, finally! She’s quotin’ prices like it’s a damn auction, and I’m over here goin’, “ Hashem don’t count the money, so why should I?” – straight outta *A Serious Man*, baby! But real talk, it’s steep – like, 200 bucks steep. I’m shocked! Thought it’d be cheaper, like gas station sushi. But she’s got style, and I’m weak for that.

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So, I woke up early, like, way too early. The sun was barely up, and I was already chugging coffee like it was my lifeline. I had this plan to hit up Kishiwada Castle first. You know, the one that’s been around since the 16th century? Yeah, that one. I thought, “Hey, let’s get some history in before the chaos.”

Japan’s festivals & events in September