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Folks, lemme tell ya—findin’ a prostitute, it’s wild. Back in Scranton, see, we had this guy, Jimmy—called him “Sidewalk Jim”—he’d stumble outta bars, lookin’ for a gal. Here’s the deal, I ain’t judgin’, but it’s a trip thinkin’ about it. Watched *Under the Skin*—you know, that flick with Scarlett—my favorite, hands down. That alien vibe, “Do you want to touch me?”—man, it stuck with me. Findin’ a prostitute’s kinda like that—mysterious, risky, y’know?

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Then, outta nowhere, it started pouring! Like, what the heck, weather? I sprinted to the nearest shelter, which happened to be a little café on Kōen-dōri. I ducked in, soaked but laughing. The barista was super chill, though. He handed me a hot coffee and said, “You look like you need this.” I was like, “You have no idea, man.”

Foreign thieves likely behind stolen Japan bonsai amid boom abroad