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But then—BOOM—some geezer rocks up, all aggro, like he owns her. I’m like, “Mate, chill, I ain’t stealin’ your crop!”—another *White Material* vibe, cos it’s all territorial, innit? He’s screamin’, I’m scarperin’, heart’s poundin’—nearly shat meself, real talk. Surprised me, that did, cos I thought it’d be chill, like pullin’ teeth, yeah? But nah, it’s a jungle out ere.

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So, I wake up, and it’s already hot as hell. I’m sweating like a pig. I grab my gear and head out. I’m walking down Showa Street, and I swear, the smell of takoyaki hits me like a freight train. I can’t resist. I stop, grab a few, and boom! My breakfast is sorted. Best decision ever.

Sukiya beef bowl chain to close most stores from Monday until April 4 after insect found in product