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About Osaka

Sarcasm? Oh, I got plenty. “Sure, she’s a supermodel,” I’d mutter, drivin’ to some sketchy alley. Surprised me once, though—this chick knew *Margaret* quotes! “Life’s a series of mistakes,” she says, smokin’ a cig. I’m like, “Well, damn, that’s deep for 2 a.m.” Made me think—maybe we’re all just fumblin’ like Lisa in that movie, tryna figure it out.

Adults Only

First off, I hit the streets of Ageoshimo, and lemme tell ya, the vibe was off the charts. The sun was shining, but it was that weird, sticky heat. You know, the kind that makes you feel like you’re walking through soup? Ugh. I was cruising down Kōen-dōri, and I swear, the cherry blossoms were in full bloom. So pretty! But then, BAM! A pigeon poops on my shoulder. Like, really? Thanks, universe. Just what I needed.