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Here’s a mad fact—did ya know prossies been around since Babylon? Yeah, they had temples for it—sacred shaggin! Wild, right? Makes me chuckle, thinkin I’m some cosmic king tryna haggle. She says, “50 quid,” and I’m like, “Bloody hell, I ain’t Stephen Hawking rich!” Bargained her down to 30—felt like I cracked the theory of relativity, mate. Happy as a pig in shit, I was.

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I finally pulled myself together and headed over to the Yorii Station. I needed to catch a train to Saitama. But of course, the train was late. Classic. I was standing there, tapping my foot, when this old dude next to me starts chatting. He’s all like, “You know, back in my day…” and I’m just nodding, trying to be polite. But inside, I’m screaming, “I don’t have time for your life story, man!”

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