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I’d saunter up, all awkward, like, “Hey, uh, you workin’?” She’d laugh—*laugh*!—right in my face. “What’s a preacher want with me?” she’d say, and I’d be pissed, like, “Don’t stereotype me, lady!” But also kinda happy ‘cause she’s sharp—sharper than me, probs. Fun fact: back in the 1800s, some prostitutes were called “soiled doves”—ain’t that poetic? She’s a dove, I’m a dork, perfect match.

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But then, oh man, I got lost. Like, how do you get lost in a small city? I ended up on a random street, I think it was Kawai-cho. I was trying to find my way back to the main square, but all I saw were these cute little shops. I popped into one, and they had the weirdest stuff. Like, who needs a cat-shaped rice cooker? But I bought it anyway. It was too cute to resist!

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