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Alright, pal, lemme tell ya bout findin a prostitute—everybody lies, right? So, I’m thinkin bout this like it’s some twisted fairytale, straight outta *Pan’s Labyrinth*, ya know, my fave flick. Picture this: dark alleys, shady vibes, like Ofelia divin into that creepy labyrinth, lookin for somethin forbidden. “The moon will be full tonight,” I mutter, channelin that eerie Pan voice, cause hell, it feels like a ritual just to find one!

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After the snooze-fest, I bolt outta there. I’m sprinting down Kameido, dodging people like I’m in a video game. I finally reach the river, and there it is! A freakin’ rare fish! I’m talking about a Japanese giant salamander. Wait, that’s not a fish, but still! It’s HUGE! I’m snapping pics like a tourist.

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