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Findin one? Easy, yet not. Apps now, dude—tech’s wild, prostitutes got profiles like LinkedIn! Swipe for a helix match, haha—sarcasm, mine! Risky, it is—cops, creeps, STDs floatin like bad plasmids. Exaggeratin? Maybe—heard a guy got robbed blind, left with a fake wig and a “thanks, sugar!” note. Laughed, I did, dark humor saves me. “Do not wait,” Yoda’d say—true, hesitate and you’re ghosted, cash gone.

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After that drama, I decided to check out the Tanashicho Art Museum. I thought, “Maybe some culture will calm me down.” But nah, the exhibit was closed for renovations. I was like, “Are you kidding me?” I felt like the universe was conspiring against me.