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About Kobe

Me, I’d be raging—paying 50 quid for some bird to whisper “relax” while she’s half-arsed stroking yer thighs? Sod off! Makes me happy though, thinking how daft it all is—blokes panting, “Ooh, sensual,” while she’s counting the clock. Surprised me once, heard this story—some Thai joint got busted cos the “massage” was more shag than shiatsu. Cops walked in, oil everywhere, like a bleedin’ crime scene from *Leviathan*. “Who’s to blame?” they’d say in the film—well, the randy twat who booked it, obviously!

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So, I grab my tools and head to this job on Shōwa-dōri. It’s a small house, but the owner, Mr. Tanaka, is a real piece of work. He’s all like, “Make it perfect!” Dude, I’m a carpenter, not a magician! I’m sweating bullets, trying to measure this and that. And then, bam! I hit my thumb with the hammer. Ouch! I’m cursing like a sailor.

Black smoke rising from Japan thermal power plant after explosion