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Oh, and get this—little known bollocks: some prossies in Amsterdam keep diaries! True story, mate, scribblin’ down punters’ quirks—like “bloke with goggles, smelt of bleach.” That’s me, that is! Exaggeratin’ for effect? Maybe, but who gives a toss? It’s a laugh! Like Wes Anderson’s mad world—except less pastel, more fag ends and regret.

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Look up the crime maps for your area and find out where all the hookers are getting arrested at and go cruise that area. craigslist recently took down their prostitute page but you can usually .

I head home, exhausted but happy. I think about how wild today was. From coffee to surgery to a festival, all in one day. Tahara, you never cease to amaze me. I crash on my bed, and I’m out like a light. What a freakin’ day!

At Little Tokyo's Far Bar, every Ohtani home run is cause for celebration