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I’m sittin’ there, thinkin’, “What animal are you?” – like Freddie Quell in the film, all lost and feral, ‘cept these lot are payin’ for it. Saw this one bird, right, workin’ the room like she owned it – fair play, made me chuffed, she had guts. But then some wanker starts hagglin’ – hagglin’! – like it’s a car boot sale. “Oi, you twat, it’s not a bloody negotiation!” I wanted to scream. Surprised me, though, how calm she stayed – ice cold, propa legend.

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Suddenly, it starts to rain. Of course! Just my luck. I scramble to pack up my stuff, and I’m soaked in seconds. I’m running down Takayanagi Street, dodging puddles like I’m in some kind of obstacle course. I’m laughing at myself, thinking, “This is gonna make a great story.”