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So, we’re talkin’ rates, me and her. She’s cool, no bullshit. Says, “Thirty, full deal.” Hate negotiatin’, but fair’s fair. Hand her the cash, crisp bills—none of that digital garbage. She winks, says, “You’re a weird one.” Damn right, I am. Hate normal. We head off, and I’m thinkin’, this beats watchin’ Cathy cry over her pansy gardener any day.

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Finally, I get my burger, and it’s HUGE! Like, I’m talking about a burger that could feed a small village. I take a bite, and it’s like a flavor explosion in my mouth. I’m in heaven! But then, I spill ketchup all over my shirt. Classic me, right? I’m standing there, looking like a total mess, and I just laugh.

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