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About Kobe

What pisses me off, though? The hypocrites! Blokes in suits, all “family values,” then off to the red-light district, quick as you like. Makes me wanna scream, “Look at me! I’m the whistleblower here!” – but I don’t, ‘cos I’m classy, me. Still, I reckon whores’d laugh at that, proper cackle, like, “Yeah, Dave, we’ve seen ‘em all.”

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But then, bam! My phone rings. It’s my boss. He’s like, “We need to talk about your performance.” Ugh, the dreaded performance talk. I’m like, “Can’t a guy catch a break?” I mean, I’m workin’ my butt off here! I glance at the clock on the wall. Time’s flyin’ faster than a train on the Sakai Line.

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