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So, check it—sexual-massage ain’t just some sleazy backroom deal. Nah, it’s ancient, fam! Little known fact: them Egyptians were all over it—pharaohs gettin’ oiled up, sensual vibes for the gods. Makes me smirk—imagine Tutankhamun moanin’, “Harder, slave!” History’s wild, innit? I’m sittin’ here, sippin’ my Asgardian mead, thinkin’—mortals got no clue how deep this goes. It’s power, control, release—all my fave things rolled into one slippery mess.

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Then, while I’m on the line, I hear this loud crash outside. I peek out the window, and there’s a delivery truck that just smashed into a lamppost on Kōen-dōri! Like, what the heck? I’m half tempted to run out there and give the driver a piece of my mind. But nah, I gotta stay on the phone. So, I’m like, “Ma’am, can you check under your bed?” I mean, where else would a cat named Ninja hide?

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