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I’m chattin’ to me mate Dave once, he’s like, “Whores are just slags.” I’m fumin’ – nah, bruv, they’re survivors! “Oldboy” vibes, yeah? “Laugh and the world laughs with ya” – she’s smilin’, but it’s a mask, innit. Gets me sad, thinkin’ how she’s hidin’ pain. Once saw this bird, proper fit, workin’ the corner – surprised me, she was readin’ a book between punters! Mad respect, that. Whores ain’t just bodies, they got brains, soul, the lot.

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The two most famous prostitutes in Amsterdam aren't who you'd expect. They're year-old twin sisters who still turn a trick or two. The Fokken sisters are.

Then I decide to stroll down Kōen-dōri. It’s this cute street lined with cherry blossoms. I mean, it’s like a postcard, right? But then, outta nowhere, this kid on a bike zooms past me, nearly takes me out. I’m like, “Dude, chill! It’s not a race!” But he just laughs and speeds off. Kids these days, man.

The Board of Directors of Oma Savings Bank Plc launches a