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Last week—pissed me off—some dude on X bragged ‘bout “classy escorts.” Classy? Ha! Like lipstick on a pig. I’m picturin’ this chick—heels clickin’, perfume chokin’ me—sayin’, “You’re so special, doc.” Bullshit. Reminds me of *Her*: “I can’t live in your book anymore.” Yeah, lady, I ain’t your fairy tale either. Prostitutes don’t love ya—they clock in, clock out. Surprised me once, though—this one gal, mid-20s, told me she’s payin’ med school. Med school! Swear to God, I nearly hugged her—then remembered the germs.

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So, I’m munchin’ on my onigiri, walkin’ down the street, and I spot this little shop on Kawai Street. They sell the cutest handmade crafts. I’m talkin’ about stuff that makes you go “Aww!” But then, I see a kid knock over a display. Ugh! My heart sank. The shop owner looked like she was about to cry. I rushed over, helped her pick up the mess. She was super grateful, and I felt like a hero for a sec.

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