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About Saitama

So, findin’ a prostitute—where do ya even start? Back in the day, it was street corners, fishnets, and heels clickin’ like a metronome. Now? It’s all digital, baby—apps, sites, sketchy ads poppin’ up like whack-a-mole. I’m scrollin’ X one night, seein’ posts— “Discrete fun, hit me up!”—and I’m like, discrete with an E? Honey, you ain’t foolin’ no one. Makes me mad, tho—half these girls look barely legal, and the other half? Bots. Freakin’ bots! Catfish city, population: me, pissed off.

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First off, I’m an accountant. Yeah, I know, super exciting, right? But today was anything but boring. I hit up the local konbini on Koshigaya Street for my morning coffee. You know, the usual—grabbed a couple of onigiri and a can of Boss coffee. I swear, that stuff is like liquid gold. But then, boom! I spill half of it on my shirt. Great start, huh?

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