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Little fact for ya—didja know sex-dating apps spike on Valentine’s? Yeah, lonely hearts get desperate, it’s hilarious! I was on there once, scrollin’, and this chick’s like, “DTF, no strings.” Straight up! I’m thinkin’, “Bloody hell, love, at least buy me dinner first!” Got me mad, tho—where’s the chase, the thrill? Everyone’s so damn lazy now. Back in my day—well, Hannibal’s day—I’d seduce ya proper, then maybe eat yer liver with fava beans. Classy, yeah?

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Then I hit up the Muikamachi Station. It’s a small station, but it’s got character. I love how it’s surrounded by mountains. Like, nature is literally hugging the city. But, ugh, the train was late. I was waiting there, tapping my foot, getting all impatient. I mean, I’ve got places to be!

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