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But when it works? Oh, mate, pure bliss. Found this one gal—proper stunner—near Soho. She’s givin’ me the eye, I’m quotin’, “This thing gets started, it’s hard to stop.” She laughs, says, “Fancy a ride, guv?” I’m in—shaken, not stirred, heart poundin’ like a drum. We’re off, and I’m thinkin’, *Bloody hell, this beats a martini any day.*

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Then, I decide to stroll along the waterfront. The sun’s setting, and it’s all pink and orange. I’m feeling good, ya know? But then, I see this group of kids playing soccer. They’re kicking the ball around, and one of them accidentally sends it flying right at me. I dodge it like a ninja, but then I trip over my own feet. Classic! I’m on the ground, laughing at myself. The kids are cracking up too.

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