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About Saitama

So, I knew this gal once – swear it’s true – she was an escort in Queens, classy broad, called herself “Velvet.” She’d strut in heels higher than my hair, and lemme tell ya, that’s HIGH. She said, “Fran, I make bank, but the stories? Nuts!” One dude paid her to just sit there, silent, watchin’ him eat spaghetti. Spaghetti! Can ya believe it? I was dyin’, like, “What’s next, sauce on his face?” She laughed, said it beats waitin’ tables. Fair, fair.

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Finally, the truck shows up. And guess what? The driver’s a rookie. He backs up and—bam!—hits a tree. I’m standing there, mouth agape. Like, are you serious? I can’t even. So, I march over, ready to give him a piece of my mind. But then I see he’s just a kid, probably fresh outta school. I can’t be too mad, right? I mean, we’ve all been there.

Niigata bear sightings, attacks spike due to food shortages