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So, say I’m huntin’ one down—maybe I’m in a big city, feelin’ lonesome. I’d start pokin’ ‘round X, see what’s poppin’. Posts flyin’—“Lookin’ for company? DM me!” Links to pics, blurry as hell, but you get the gist. I’d dig deeper, check profiles—some chick named “CandyLips69” with a bio sayin’, “Livin’ fast, cash only!” Git-R-Done, right? But here’s where it gets hairy—half these ads? Scams! Had a buddy once, sent $200 to some “escort”—turned out to be a dude in Nigeria! Pissed me off somethin’ fierce—ripped off and blue-balled!

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But then, just when I think it’s all smooth sailing, I realize I forgot my measuring tape. Ugh! I’m running back to my truck, and I trip over a rock. Classic! I’m sprawled out on the ground, and I can’t help but laugh. Like, really? This is my life?

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