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In my head, I’m screamin’, *Don’t mess this up, dummy!* We’re drivin’—where? No clue! She’s laughin’ at my jokes—miracle! “You’re a trip,” she says. I’m like, “That’s what she said!”—can’t stop, won’t stop! It’s messy, it’s nuts, but damn, it’s fun—findin’ a prostitute ain’t boring, that’s for sure!

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Then, it’s time for the open mic. I’m nervous, but excited. I get up there, and the crowd’s hyped. I start playin’, and it’s like magic. I’m pouring my heart out, and they’re feelin’ it. I look out, and there’s that kid from the park, clappin’ like a maniac.

Soccer club Machida Zelvia files complaints over alleged defamation