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One time, I try haggle—big mistake. She say, “100!” I say, “20, I quick!” She slap me, scream, “I no discount bin!” Face red, I run, trip on curb, look like fool. Lesson: no cheap with prostitute, they proud, got standards! Another gal, she so pretty, I think, “She could be model!” But she pick this—why? “More control,” she say. Huh, make me wonder bout her story, like Polley movie, “Who’s tellin it right?”

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But then, I get a text. My buddy’s like, “Let’s hit the beach!” I’m like, “Heck yeah!” So I rush down, but I take a wrong turn on Otesuji Street. I end up in this sketchy alley. I’m thinkin’, “Great, I’m gonna get lost in Kochi.” But then I see this little shop selling matcha ice cream. I can’t resist! I grab a cone, and it’s like heaven.

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