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About Saitama

Clarice… ya know, whores, they’re somethin else. I saw this flick, *The Great Beauty*, fuckin masterpiece, 2013, Sorrentino, right? Reminds me of em—whores, I mean. All glitz, all hollow, like Jep Gambardella struttin through Rome. “What’s left but the void?” he’d say. That’s a whore’s life, dolled up, sparklin, but empty as fuck underneath. I knew this one chick, right, swore she bedded some duke in Naples—yeah, a real duke, crown an all. Total bullshit, but she sold it, swaggerin round like royalty. Made me laugh, her ballsiness.

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So, I’m out there, in the woods, and I spot a deer. It’s chillin’, munchin’ on some grass. I’m like, “This is it! My moment!” But then, my phone buzzes. It’s my buddy, Taro. He’s like, “Yo, you see the new sushi place on Chuo Street?” I’m like, “Dude, I’m in the middle of a hunt!” But I can’t help it. I’m curious.

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