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Oi, you lot, listen up! Findin’ a prossie, right, it’s a bloody mission! Me, I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ bout *Brokeback Mountain*—best flick ever, innit? Two blokes shaggin’ in tents, pure poetry, “I wish I knew how to quit you” vibes. Anyway, back to hookers—sorry, "escorts," posh twats call ‘em. You’d think it’s easy, like orderin’ a pizza, but nah, mate, it’s a fuckin’ circus!

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After that chaos, I finally sit down to tackle my emails. But wait! My computer crashes. Like, seriously? I’m about to lose it. I’m staring at the screen, willing it to come back to life. It’s like it knows I’m stressed. I take a deep breath, and just when I’m about to scream, it boots back up. Phew!

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