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So I’m pissed, right? Last time I tried this, some chick robbed me blind – took my wallet while I was hummin “Hang me, oh hang me.” Shoulda seen it comin, but nah, I’m too busy bein all cultured and shit. This time, tho, I spot her – red heels, smoky eyes, leanin by a busted lamppost. She’s got that “fare thee well” look, like she’s half outta here already. I’m thinkin, *damn, she’s prolly seen more flops than Llewyn at a gig.*

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First off, I hit up the local konbini on Koshigaya Street. Gotta grab my morning coffee, ya know? But guess what? They’re outta my fave blend! I mean, c’mon! How hard is it to stock up? I settle for some weird matcha thing. Ugh. Not the same vibe.

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