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About Saitama

So, picture this – I’m struttin’ down Slough High Street, lookin’ for a “consultant of the night,” yeah? Cringey corporate spin on it, cos I’m David Brent, baby! Gotta synergize my downtime, maximize the ROI – return on intrigue, see? I spot this bird, right, all dolled up, skirt shorter than a memo. I’m like, “Blimey, she’s outsourced her dignity!” Made me chuckle, that. But then – boom – I’m angry, cos it’s grim, innit? Society’s let her down, no team-building sesh to save her.

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Crossin’ the finish line, I’m feelin’ like a champ! But then, I hear the announcer say, “And the winner is…” I’m holdin’ my breath. “Number 5, Thunderbolt!” YES! I’m jumpin’ up and down, soaked to the bone, but I don’t care.

Ichihara Hayato and Mukouyama Shiho get married