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Hey buddy, lemme tell ya bout findin a prostitute, yknow, like a webcam bizness deal! I reckon it’s a wild ride, like that flick *Inception*—dreams in dreams, reality all twisty. “We’re in a dream within a dream,” like Cobb says, right? That’s how it feels tryna track one down online—layers of shady sites, fake pics, catfishers galore. Fool me once, shame on—uh—shame on you, fool me twice—well, ya can’t get fooled again, heh!

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Then, I’m hustling to the office on Takayama Street, and I trip over a loose stone. Classic me, right? I’m sprawled out on the ground, and this group of school kids starts laughing. I just lay there for a sec, thinking, “Great, now I’m a meme.” But then, one of the kids helps me up. Sweet little dude. Made my day a bit better.

Easy Japanese news in translation: Gujo Odori dance festival begins in Gifu Prefecture