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About Osaka

Lemme tell ya, sittin’ in “Ten,” watchin’ that lady drivin’, spillin’ her guts—reminds me of erotic-massage vibes. “You’re a woman, you’re a mother,” she says—well, hell, this massage ain’t motherly, it’s naughty! Hands roamin’ where they shouldn’t, kneadin’ knots outta yer soul. Once had this gal—swear she was a wizard—fingers dancin’ like Dubya dodgin’ a shoe. Felt like I’d died and gone to Crawford, y’all. Surprised me how it’s legal—well, sorta, depends on the joint.

Goshogawara

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So, I’m already cranky. I stroll down to the Goshogawara Station, tryin’ to shake it off. The streets are packed, like, seriously, who knew this place could get so busy? I’m dodging people left and right on Kōen-dōri. I swear, I almost tripped over a kid with a kite. Like, dude, it’s not a park!

Japanese farmer's house transformed into hotel by Shotaro Oshima Design Studio