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Yo, so I’m a scientist, right? Talkin’ ‘bout whores today. Not like, lab rats or nothin’. Real deal, street vibe whores. Watched *Inside Llewyn Davis* last night—my fave, man. That Coen brothers joint from 2013. Got me thinkin’—whores got layers, yo. Like Llewyn, just tryna survive. “Hang me, oh hang me,” he sings. Whores prolly feel that daily.

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We get there, and it’s packed. I mean, who knew shoes were such a big deal? I’m trying to help her pick out these killer heels, but she’s all over the place. “What about these? No, wait, these?” I’m losing my mind. Finally, she settles on these sparkly ones. I’m like, “You do you, boo.”